Overcoming Premature Ejaculation
The occurrence of involuntary ejaculation can be most disconcerting to a male whose ego is closely tied to his sexual abilities. Any type of sexual dysfunction can deliver a crushing blow to the male ego.
There are many things to do to overcome the problem of premature ejaculation including couple's therapy, and certain methods that reprogram the way a male controls his ejaculate. The ability of a male to to have ejaculatory control is a very freeing sexual experience that usually has a positive effect on his sex life.
The occurrence of involuntary ejaculation can be most disconcerting to a male whose ego is closely tied to his sexual abilities. Any type of sexual dysfunction can deliver a crushing blow to the male ego. Premature ejaculation can cause great anxiety and distress to the male as well as to the couple.
The human body undergoes 4 phases of sexual arousal. Each phase is important to the success of the sexual encounter. The four-phase process of sexual arousal starts with excitement, in this phase there is a definite deepening of breathing as the erection starts. In the plateau stage the erection engorges and becomes full, the sexual excitement is in the highly aroused state. The next phase is orgasm with ejaculation and then the last phase is the resolution or letdown, where breathing returns to normal. The key to successful ejaculation that is timed to when the couple is ready for it is to extend the plateau phase and maintain arousal without triggering ejaculation prematurely.
It is important that you not impede ejaculation control by stopping all drug or alcohol usage that is not medically necessary. Drugs and alcohol distract and interfere with the male's ability to be aware of what is happening in his ability to control ejaculation.
Males need to learn to experience whole body sex and to not concentrate in the penis area alone. To truly experience good sex, it must be a whole body sensation. Sensual pleasure that occurs over the entire body is very relaxing and it has been determined that a tense body is more likely to release ejaculate prematurely. Turning your tense body into a relaxed one through whole body sexual arousal can give you more control over your ejaculate timing.
Two ways to achieve whole body relaxation are: a romantic bath and a romantic massage. Take a couple's shower, that is another ideal way to enjoy entire body arousal.
The body has a natural desire to deep breath during sex, but for some reason men tend to fight this natural urge. Deep breathing helps to relax the body. The work a man does to counter this natural tendency takes away from his control over ejaculation.
Learning self-control in ejaculation is sometimes achieved by learning while masturbating.
Steps to Learning Control:
Start with masturbation with a dry hand.
Vary how you caress your penis and you can learn to stay highly aroused without coming, which is what you need to do to avoid premature ejaculation.
When you feel yourself approaching your "point of no return", stop caressing for a bit. You can stroke gently or not at all depending on how confident you are.
The goal at this point is to stay aroused without ejaculating.
You will then feel yourself becoming distanced from your point of no "return, return", this is when you can start to caress again to accomplish a more vigorous self-stimulation.
Repeat these steps several times over during several sessions. Most men will be able to develop good ejaculatory control within a short time.
Then move on to masturbation with a lubricated hand. Lubricants increase the sensual intensity of erotic fondling. Follow the same steps as above.
Masturbate until you approach your "point of no return", then back off. Repeat this several times over several sessions.
Gaining control is key to treatment, learn how your body responds and listen to what your body is saying. Premature ejaculation can be conquered with patience and practice.